Outside The Window

There are tons of things outside the window, but most of the time, none of them interests me actually. I've been enjoying staring out of the window lately when I'm on the bus, not exactly because there's a great view outside, it's because of the sense of peacefulness that it brings to your mind, a second to let your mind rest without thinking or processing thoughts that you can do some other time while you're eating, studying, listening, not sleeping or whatsoever. I've been thinking a lot these days(not academically,yea,shame on me), perhaps since the day I learnt about some tremendously awe-striking deep dark secret about my family, something my aunt blurted out out of the blue in the middle of a mundane conversation on a relaxing afternoon at home and left my jaw fell down to the ground(and stuck to it), left me ponder about it for quite some time.

Voices To You.....

And to top it off, that night spent most of it chatting with you. It started off with some interesting but a bit peculiar-blended with a bit of creeps stuff that is happening in your working place, and then i shared one or two of mine. After that, somehow we found ourselves reviewing our chronicles, a bitter one, and i think i saw tears damping your eyes. That moment I felt like i was punched hard on the stomach, slapped hot on the face and hugging you. However, neither of those happened. I felt sorry for everything. I shouldn't have brought that up or even gone there, i'd rather have you read me the riot act; nag me about every little thing than watching you this way. I'm sorry if I ever rebelled you; not listen to you; not pay attention to you after you stood up for us; fought for us; faced all odds for us; kept the pain to yourself from us. At the dawn of the day, I vowed to myself silently that I'm gonna make something great out of myself and provide you the best life I can; not let you fight the battle alone.

There I am, thinking again. Therefore, staring out of the window into the distance is exactly something I need to free my mind, coz out there, it's somebody else's life, something I can care less about, so I can find back the serenity in my head. Hence, I'm just gonna keep staring. And leave me be; don't misregard me as some weirdo.hah Xp